I'm afraid I read that whole thing twice and I'm still not sure what your question is. :?
The first thing to come to mind as I read was NEC 230.2, which generally prohibits 2 services for the same structure. It's not an absolute rule -- there are some pretty clearly defined exceptions -- but I wouldn't expect to find any of the exceptions in a residence, unless it's a
RESIDENCE. I suppose you could technically have one service supplying two meters... Otherwise, this in itself is probably a violation (couldn't say for sure without more information, though).
I'm confused by the use of "single 40A circuit" and "dual 40A circuit". So you know, a typical residential service in the US is 120/240V, single phase. The voltage from either "hot" to neutral is 120V, while the voltage between the two "hots" is 240V. When you say "single 40A circuit" I think you mean the circuit is connected to a 40A, 1-pole breaker. This would be a 40A, 120V circuit. When you say "dual 40A circuit" I think you mean the circuit is connected to a 40A, 2-pole breaker. This would be a 40A, 240V circuit.
If that's the case, then you need to understand that most equipment is rated for either 120V or 240V -- you can't just switch between the two. If you have a 120V water heater, it needs to be connected to a 1-pole breaker. If you have a 240V water heater, it needs to be connected to a 2-pole breaker.
I assume there's something I'm not getting here, because it sounds like 2 of your water heaters (the 12kW and the 14kW maybe?) are being fed from 40A, 1-pole breakers (120V). The thing is, 12kW at 120V is 100A, and 14kW at 120V is 117A. Even if all of the water heaters are actually connected to 2-pole breakers (240V), 12kW at 240V is still 50A, and that's your smallest heater! This all seems a bit unlikely, given that you say you haven't had a breaker trip.
So something's not right here, but it's hard to tell exactly what. Of course, it's entirely possible that the only real problem is that I totally misunderstood you.
P.S. I just saw Charlie's last post, and he's right. There's a lot more that goes into load calculations than you would imagine, and throwing a generator into the mix only complicates things further. When I do load calcs, I often spend a week or so chasing down and collecting information from various manufacturers before I ever start to do an actual calculation. People take special classes just to learn how to do NEC compliant load calcs, and it's not because they're bad at math. There are just too many nuances to explore and explain in a forum setting like this.
Now, if you had posted an actual load calculation and asked, "Do you see any issues with this?" that might have gotten you some more useful responses.
P.P.S. If your city has an electrical plans review division, they're usually pretty good about checking things like load calculations. That seems to only exist in larger cities, though. If your city does have one, I'd recommend worrying about it even less. If the electrician is able to get the calculations approved by the electrical plans review division, I seriously doubt you'll have problems with things like overloaded breakers or panels.